British Expats Chime In About American Women

British men are having to cope with British women indoctrinated by feminism in the dating market just as much as any other western man in his own country.  So when the Seattle Times wrote an article about the opinions some British expats living in America have about American women, it makes me take notice and wonder if the American woman is simply a problem for the American man or do men of other countries share the same opinion.

It turns out that the Brits don’t like American women much either.  And that’s saying a lot because they know British women so their standards shouldn’t have been that high to begin with, and I’ve seen British men kill in America’s dating market.  Their accent really gets our ladies weak in the knees (the cockney accent notwithstanding).  My youngest aunt even married a British guy and seem to be living happily ever after.

Of course, it’s the guy’s fault, right?  Gwyneth Paltrow was quoted:

British men appear scared to ask me out

You don’t say?  At around the time this article was published, Paltrow’s star was rising rapidly.  She had just won an Academy Award for best actress for her role in Shakespeare in Love, she was recently engaged to Brad Pitt and had a relationship with Ben Affleck.  Within a year after this quote, she would be married to the lead singer of Coldplay and push out two kids named Apple and Moses.  “Scared” wouldn’t be the right word for it.  More like the Brits knew a long shot when they saw one and didn’t bother.  Paltrow wasn’t an unknown.  She had the stench of celebrity and could pull A-list celebrity men herself so why make a fool of yourself trying to ask this American woman out?  If you think this isn’t really relevant when talking about most women, I beg to differ.  The American woman thinks she is already a celebrity due to the attention she gets in public, and when social media surged onto the scene, this attitude became even worse.

But don’t expect women to own up to the problem.  Feminism was all about creating a narrative in which all the evils of the world and denied opportunities to women were due to male agency and they’re not about to abandon that narrative now after it has accomplished so much on their behalf.  Another article from the Spectator claims to know why the Brits don’t seem to put up with the modern woman:

a) Many went to boarding school at an early age, thus forfeiting essential affection from their mothers, leaving them all but incapable of intimacy with women.

b) Many drink too much, leaving them all but incapable of intimacy with women.

c) They are repressed homosexuals.

d) They simply don’t like women.

I’ve long stopped being amused by women’s massed delusions about men in this country and I’m not alone.  James Brown, a London magazine editor says,

American Women. You can only spend so long with one before you crack. They’re out there, they’re loud, they’re bitter and they’re kooky. After a while all the things that attracted you to them: confidence, conversation, nice teeth, begin to bug you. You think you’ve got Black Beauty and you end up with Mr. Ed.

This is a blunt way of saying that many AW are all flash and no substance.  We think they are pretty hot until they open their mouths in the spirit of “being assertive” or “empowered”.  None of these qualities appeal to men.

Martin has had a different experience:

One of the first questions is always: “What car do I drive?” Martin says. “If I have the latest BMW or drive a Chevy, does it make a difference? And they want to know what apartment you live in. Do you live in Bellevue, because if you tell them you live in Everett, they don’t want to know you.”

This reminds me of that scene from Swingers when a guy tries to approach a woman at a party and the first question she asks is what he drives.  After replying he drives a Cavalier, she turns away in disgust without saying a word.  I can’t say that I’ve had this happen to me in the dating scene in the US – not so overtly anyway.  But I do get asked a lot about what I do.  I learned very quickly that being a chemist doesn’t really get a woman’s heart racing.  A generation ago, this type of job would have commanded respect and I would have had everyone from a girl’s parents to the friends in her sewing circle advocating for me.

On the other hand, Steve describes an experience that I can corroborate:

 American women reserve the right to date a whole bunch of guys at the same time.

That’s a bingo!  It was often difficult for me to get traction with many AW because they always had several men in rotation and felt no need to make a commitment or devote any time to me.  I either had to tolerate the present state of affairs, make an expensive gesture and hope I don’t get into a bidding war with the other guys, or simply leave.  I often chose to leave while the woman and her friends were most likely assuring her that if I was “the one” I would have been completely devoted and wouldn’t have left.  But seeing a woman ride the cock carousel doesn’t inspire me to get to know her any better, nor do I imagine my future wife or mother of my children with such a woman.

Then there’s Oliver’s experience with AW:

It was like being with a nasty bank manager, rather than someone with whom you hope to sleep. … American girls are possibly the most wound-up people on the planet. They don’t believe in laughing: Instead, they would go to ‘laugh class’ to find out how, then solemnly say it had changed their life.

For all the AW or British women who wonder what happened to romance and why chivalry is dead, this passage is very telling.  I can’t think of a faster way to suck romance out of the relationship than when a woman treats it like a financial transaction.

Is this getting through to anybody yet?  It can’t just be the problem of a few lonely men when the British men find that AW are even worse than British women!  The only thing that surprises me is why there aren’t more American men looking overseas.



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4 responses to “British Expats Chime In About American Women

  1. Pingback: A One-Year Recap! | Love Gone Global

  2. Jill's

    For all the BM who shared their horrible experiences with AW here, I sincerely feel bad that you were all made to feel so under appreciated and disrespected. Unfortunately, it seems these are things you are far more likely to find when dating in larger cities. I once believed wholeheartedly that is was predominantly women who carried most of the pain and anguish in relationships by entangling themselves with men who failed to hold onto a job, refused to commit, were unfaithful and just very poor relationship material in general. All my misconceptions changed when I sat with an open mind and listened to a couple of my gentlemen friends share his stories of heartbreak from dealing with entitled gold diggers; and alas, my brother just got divorced from one after she walked out Christmas Day, but not before informing him that she was going on a trip for five days with a man that she had met on the Internet and that she wanted out of the marriage. She assured my brother that it was “Nothing personal, it was just business.” Yes, I see it from both sides. I would add that I guess hurt, betrayal, unfair and unrealistic expectations does indeed cross every boundary of humankind. Lack of respect and reciprocity never feels good no matter your gender. For me I just want someone to grow old with who’ll hold my hand. I want a man I can respect and dote on like crazy. I want someone by my side to kiss and as we ring in the NewYear together. I want someone who I can’t wait to get home to everyday. Someone I can cook for and admire across the table at evening meals. I want a shoulder to rest my head upon when I watch television at night. I want someone to laugh with who shares my secret jokes and gets them. These are a few of the things that would strum the chords of my soul and I would do it all gladly in the ugliest house on any street if I had his heart. And I’m an AW. Thankfully we are all unique in our own way and it saddens me to think that we are all the same. I can assure you there are countless Men and Women all across middle America that have depth beyond measure and feel so appreciative when offered the benefit of the doubt. I’ve put down my preconceived notions and meet others with a clean slate. I hope you’ll do the same. You never know the treasure you just may pass up that could be standing right beside you if you simply trust that every person has an original and unique story that’s all their own to tell. And for the record, and though it might not be worth much, I still love BM. Jills

  3. Machia

    Man not only is this arrival damn depressing is it so not true I hate sterio tyiping I was married to a British man for 10 years he wan not charming witty or loving we’ll, not in the romantic way and he had a bit of a wondering eye or he cold only see in shades of gray lol still does, he is not very soulful at all, he was dry and thinks he’s always right no matter what. I wish he was like Hue Grant or some really romantic old fashioned type gentlemen but alas hes not! Poor me and yes for me British men are the only guys i am attracted to but then again i am not your average american women. I was raised in a very very stricket Apostolic church. All of my ancestors are brits , Germans, italians , French, Scottish and American indians . when people see me they think I am Swedish lol. Anyway we have been divorced to 6 years I am now moving to UK with our three kids to get my kids medical and schooling needs they can nolong get in US. I am excited and scared because I have never been to UK but I know more about it and its rich history and lovely people than I do America. I have wanted to go there my entire life. I cook English meals and there is not a time in the day that we are not serving English tea in my house and yes I use PGtips! I make homemade Scottish biscuits and scones! I love old British films, poetry and all types of music, I am an Artiest, song writer and pianoest and singer of sorts, though I manly only sing and play Spanish songs ( long story) but I play piano and other interments by ear only I cannot read music. I know British and cottney slang, I have study almost every thing I could about UK and I absolutely love it! I love old Christian Agatha movies and TV series like Hercule Piorit! I love Doctor who! Oh to get to marry the 10 th doctor! Lol i love poetry and history. I like to dress nice but believe it or not if British men would learn to quit sterio tyiping it would be great, there are loads of AW such as my self that are not self fish or soulless or only about materialistic gain. I believe I true love and love at first sight. It hasn’t quit happened for me yet, but I believe in it none the less. I don’t believe is sex before marriage, my well now x husband and I didn’t date kiss or even hold hand until we said I do, not how I would do that again but it was honerable and I am not ashamed of it, disappointed in the out come of the marriage yeah but not ashamed. I don’t mind a fuy being right a man needs to feel to some aspect a since of being needed and not controlled but for the most part if we AW feel that a bloke is loving us right treating us right and being honest and forth coming about all aspects of life and we don’t feel that he’s being nicely put sneaky and cheacky then we are more willing to let the man do his job of leading. I am a Christian so for me its even harder because I would like a gentlemen how holds at lest most of the same aspects, morals and beliefes that I do when it comes to relationship with God, Marriage, family and there ideal way of living and handling things such as relationships and finances and such. I believe everything must be equail but I hate feminest women, its not a Godly spirit. Men are to be the head. And no I do not dress or act like a Nunn or Norman or whatever if you saw me out I look habit average I don’t ware much make up I don’t care for jewelry and I really don’t ware paints or shorts ever, I wear fashionable clothing but quite modest especially compared to most modern Hoollywood wanna be women. I am very much a open book but I am not you see what you get. I would like to think that I am like unwrapping a pack of exotic chocolates or slipping a very fine old wine! Never too old to fast food and always full of life and supprises. I believe everyday is a new day and a fresh start, I believe tommorow is never promised so be the best you that you can be today while it is still today and never live with unforgiveness or regrets because they will not only kill you but everyone involved with you, what we do and say matters we need to make understanding a life choice that and the persute of wisdom our proclamation so we make good choices! Machia Gutmann

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